Blind Eye
by Sweet Amber
Summary: Sean made many mistakes before he moved to Degrassi, one he forced himself to forget. What happens when, years later, a person whom he could never completely erase from his mind, returns to his life?
1. Good Times Gone

Disclaimer: I do not own the series, the cast, the actors, or the crew behind "Degrassi: The Next Generation." The only things I own in this piece is Katarine Desories and any characters knitted to her (IE: parents, pets).  
  
This is a pure work of fiction, I am not liable for anything. The events within the text never happened in real life.  
  
~*~  
  
Sean Cameron walked up the steps of Degrassi Community School, his backpack slung over one shoulder and a black beanie pulled down to his eyebrows. Next to him was Jay, his arm around his girlfriend, and Jay's best friend. "I think we should start to drag race, make more money to fix up the car. What to do think, Sean?" Jay asked.  
  
"Car might not be fast enough. You might need a new engine anyway." Sean replied in monotone, "I've gotta get to class, I'll meet up with you at lunch." He opened the doors and walked inside the school, the air cold compared to the heat outside. He walked slowly to the English room, trying not to look at Emma Nelson as he passed her. They recently broke up and Sean was still angry about that; Emma was ignoring him and making him feel left out, the only reason why he let himself fall into Jay's group... he belonged there.  
  
Shuffling into the class room, Sean took his usual seat in the back and began to stare at the clock above the door, counting the long minutes before homeroom was over and when he could head off to shop class. Students soon began to file into the room, finding and taking their seats. He was about to rest his head down on his desk when he heard two sets of feet walk into the classroom. Everyone was already in their seats, so that meant that either there was a new student or the Mr.Qwan sprouted extra legs.  
  
Rasing his head, Sean stared as a girl followed Ms.Kwan into the room. The new girl looked to be a little lower than Sean height wise; with short fushia hair, a soft tan, skull earings, and many rings, bracelets, and necklaces. She's wearing baggy black pants, almost hiding her black and white Vans, and a white screen tee that says "I Hate People." Bright white eyeliner frames her brown eyes and a lip-ring rests in the middle of the girl's bottom lip.  
  
"Class." Ms.Kwan began, "We have a new student with us, a Miss Katarine Desories."  
  
"It's Katarin, the e is silent. My parents were on crack when they named me." She corrects Ms.Kwan, a few people in the classroom laugh.  
  
Sean squinted at the girl when her name is mentioned. 'It can't be her,' he thought to himself, 'there must be another Katarine Desories running around...'  
  
"I'm sorry." Ms.Kwan apologizes, "Would you like to tell the class about yourself?"  
  
Katarine shakes her head, "There's nothing to know."  
  
Ms.Kwan smiles weakily, "I think there's an open seat in the back by Sean. Sean, rise your hand so Katarine knows where you are."  
  
Sean, still baffled about the new girl, raises his hand into the air and glues his eyes on Katarine.  
  
Walking over to the back row, Katarine begins to stare at Sean. She takes the desk on his right, and forces her head to face the front of the room, while Sean continued to take in Katarine's image... 'It just can't be her.' Ms.Kwan's voice droned through Sean's thoughts with attendance, he raised his hand again when his name was called, but still studied Katarine.  
  
Eventually Sean laid his head on the surface of his desk and shut his eyes, fighting to not believe that the girl on his right is Katarine Rose Desories... he began to pray that she wasn't. He began to hope that the girl next to him was a completely different Katarine Desories. 


	2. A Place In The Dirt

Sean couldn't take his mind off Katarine for the rest of the school day, he was killing himself trying to convince himself that she wasn't the Katarine from his past... but it didn't seem to work. At lunch, Sean barely touched his food; he was merely staring at it as he thought. Realizing that it was pointless to stare at uneaten food, Sean decided to head to the library and start on the Math homework that was due in thirty minutes.  
  
When he arrived at the library, Sean found himself a table and spread out his books. A few minutes into the Pathagrium Theorum, someone sneezed and caused Sean's head to shoot up. There, standing a few feet away from him, was Katarine. She was reading the blurp at the back of a thick book, her hair falling in front of her face, and with a scowl she shut the book and placed it back on the shelf.  
  
Sean set down his pencil and stared at Katarine, all of a sudden seeing a vision of a younger girl. She had long blonde hair, her index finger wending around some of it. A book was in her free hand, a worn one which she read a hundred times over, and she was casually leaning against the book case. With a small sigh, the younger Katarine closed the book and, her left hand no longer toying her hair, she gripped the book tightly in her hands and cast her gaze over to Sean. "Hope?"  
  
Blinking, Sean was brought back into the current world. "What?"  
  
"I thought it was you." Katarine replied coolly, walking over to the table and sitting down across from Sean. "... You've..."  
  
"Changed?" Sean finished for her, "So have you. What did you do to your hair?" It was kind of like old times, though old times could never come to be again.  
  
Katarine tilted her head forward and shook her head slightly, her fuchsia hair shifting in the movement. "It's not as bad as your neck... God, give me a knife and I could spread some of that on biscuits." She smirked.  
  
"I've been working out." Sean stated, "What are you doing here? I almost didn't recognize you."  
  
"More like refused to?" Katarine suggested, "Mom got a new job. She freaked when I threatened to get another hole in my head."  
  
"Another?"  
  
Katarine nodded, "That was the last straw after the hair, the lip, and the ankle..."  
  
"The ankle? ... Oh." Sean frowned, remembering the tattoo on Katarine's left ankle; he went with her to get it, but by now it's probably removed. "How long has it been?"  
  
"Three, four years I think." Katarine was toying with her hair again, a nervous habit. She looked at her watch, "I've got to go. I guess we'll be seeing each other again soon." She stood up and clutched 'Frankenstein' in her hands.  
  
Sean nodded and tucked into his Math book again, soon loosing his concentration and, as the words turned into a large black blur, found himself revisiting the past again...  
  
++ Flashback ++  
  
"See that girl over there?" A black haired boy nudged Sean and pointed across the hockey field.  
  
Sean looked across the grass at the blonde, "Yeah. What about her?"  
  
"Go talk to her, she's been staring at you for a while now."  
  
"I'd rather not make a fool of myself, thank you." Sean replied somewhat bitterly. "Her boyfriend could be behind me, maybe that's why she's looking over here."  
  
Sean's friend smiled, "There's no one behind us, we're the only people sitting out of gym class."  
  
"If I don't go, you're just going to force me, right?"  
  
The boy nodded.  
  
Huffing, Sean got to his feet and stormed down the bleachers muttering to himself. He heard a few students talking as they followed the teacher back to the school building, chatting and laughing about nothing in particular. Sean gulped and stopped behind the girl he was suppose to talk to, turning into a great glob of Jell-O, "Excuse me?" He squeaked out.  
  
The girl turned around, her chocolate eyes widening for a second or two before returning to normal. "Yes?" She asked casually.  
  
"I, uh... wanted to... see, I was forced to... my aunt is very sick." Sean stammered.  
  
Trying to suppress a giggle, the girl bit down on her lip-ring. "I'm sorry." She said after a moment's pause.  
  
"No!" Sean yelled, giving the girl in front of him a start. He hung his head and grumbled, "I'm such a loser. Bruno's probably laughing his ass off right now."  
  
"Sorry, didn't catch that."  
  
Sean raised his head to see a smile on the girl's face. "Can I start over?" He asked weakly.  
  
"'Course."  
  
Feeling like an idiot, Sean sighed gratefully. "Do you know me? I'm in some of your classes... obviously."  
  
"I think so. Sam, is it?"  
  
"Sean, actually. Sean Cameron." He corrected her, catching an embarrassed look on her face.  
  
"Katarine Desories."  
  
++ Stop Flashback ++ 


	3. Throw This Away

i"Fun? And you...you're just pathetic."/i  
  
Sean sighed and turned up the volume on his cd player. He watched as other people walk home, slowly leaving Sean alone on the school steps. He was getting lost in the world of apologizing to Ms. Jackson, when a door slamming brought him hurtling back into the present world. Shutting off his cd player, Sean turned around and saw Katarine starting to walk down the steps in front of him. "Stalking me, are you?"  
  
Katarine raised her eyes to look at Sean, "Or the other way around, it's pretty hard to stalk someone while you're in detention."  
  
"Detention? It's your first day here."  
  
Katarine shrugged, "That's what you get for talking back to a teacher. Is it so wrong to be against a person's views?"  
  
"Depens on what you said, I guess. How long was I sitting here?" Sean asked.  
  
"An hour, how should I know?" Katarine continued to head down the stone steps.  
  
Sean pulled his headphones down around his neck and stood up, quickly gathering his things. "Which way are you going?"  
  
"Left. Spring Street. Why?"  
  
"I was just wondering...maybe we could walk together or something." Sean muttered, knowing full well that Katarine would probably rather gouge out her eyes than walk home with him. "Since we're both going the same way."  
  
After a pause, the only sound being the movement of Katarine's backpack and coat, she said softly, "If you want, it's not like I can stop you."  
  
Sean, not knowing whether to be happy about this or not, grumbled, "Okay, thanks." He swung his backpack over his shoulder and jogged over to Katrine. "How was your day?" He asked, mustering up words to put them into a sentence.  
  
"It was all right, for the most part, though I don't really care for History." Katarine replied halfheartedly, looking everywhere but at Sean, "I didn't know that you came here."  
  
"Yeah... well, I didn't really have time to tell you, did I? I just kind of ran off..." He gulped silently, letting his words fade away, fearing Katarine's remark.  
  
Surprisingly she said nothing, she just stared forward as the turned left and headed down the street.  
  
Biting his lip, Sean struggled for things to say. "I-"  
  
"Why are you doing this?" Katarine asked, though it seemed to be that she was asking the air.  
  
"Doing what?" Sean replied carefully.  
  
Katarine made a hand motion, "Walking with me. I would've thought that you'd rather eat a dog than ever even lay eyes me again."  
  
"You shouldn't assume things like that." Sean said haughtingly, though he didn't mean to.  
  
Through gritted teeth, Katarine replied, "You could have fooled me three years ago." She remained deathly silent after that, avoiding Sean as much as she could.  
  
He didn't mind though, it wasn't like Sean thought that everything would be peachy keen again. Sean messed up horribly three years ago, he did something that he forced himself to forget about; something that he knew would make a permanent rift between Katarine and him. He could only wonder, now that Katarine was back in his life, what she did with herself.  
  
??flashback??  
  
Sean reaches out and grabs Katarine's belt, pulling her backwards to him, "All right... I'll go. It'll be worth swimming through crap to see your stuff. Not too many people I know can turn a pile of steel into a pretty -er- manacing sculpture."  
  
Katarine turns around and huge Sean, a smile on her face. "Thanks, Hope." She gives him a quick kiss on the lips, "We'd better get to class, Lord knows Mrs.Gonwa will have a fit if we're late." She pulls out of the hug.  
  
Now holding onto Katarine's wrist, Sean leans forward and kisses Katarine and after a second of shock, she kisses him back. He pulls away slightly, after what seemed like hours, and didn't move his eyes from Katarine's. "That's the first time I've kissed a girl with a lip-ring."  
  
"... I can put in a stud." Katarine volunteers.  
  
Sean smiles, "No. I like it, it's different- good different." He gives Katarine's hand a squeeze, "We should get going."  
  
?? end flashback??  
  
Feeling completely miserable, Sean walked into his brother's apartment and into the living room, collapsing onto the couch and staring at the black television screen. He didn't bother taking his backpack off, who really cared if his discman broke? Sighing, Sean closed his eyes and scolded himself for having these flashbacks.  
  
"You all right, little bro?" Tracker asked, walking out of his bedroom and looking over at Sean, "You realize you're crushing everything in your book bag?"  
  
Sean shrugged, "I don't really care."  
  
"What's wrong? Are you ill or something?"  
  
Shaking his head, Sean let out another sigh, "Just guess who's moved here. Take a wild guess." He demanded coolly.  
  
Tracker, bewildered, shrugged. "I have no idea. What's eating you, Sean?"  
  
"Katarine Desories." Sean said in monotone.  
  
"Oh?" Tracker replied, "I take it you know her."  
  
Sean nods, "We used to date until, well, didn't Mom and Dad tell you?" He asked, trying to avoid retelling something to Tracker that Sean didn't even want flooding back to him... he already had so much guilt for what happened. 


	4. Losing My Religion

"No, they didn't tell me. You know the only thing they'd call to tell me was that they needed money." Tracker stated, sitting down on the couch next to Sean, "And would you please just take off your bookbag? If you ruin anything that's in there..."  
  
Rolling his eyes, Sean took off his backpack and tossed it to the floor. "Should I tell you everything or give you an overview?"  
  
"You don't have to bite my head off," Tracker said, somewhat resentfully, "I only want to know how Katarine's coming here is upsetting you so much."  
  
"I'm sorry." Sean apologized, "It's just really upsetting... Katarine and I used to date, but then I, uh, she got pregnant... and yes, with my kid. I walked out on her, got in that fight, and wound up here. We haven't talked to each other in three years, now Katarine moved here because her Mom got a new job." He explained gloomily.  
  
Tracker blinked, most likely trying to get the shocked expression off of his face. "You what? She got pregnant?"  
  
"It's not like we wanted it to happen, we weren't even planning on having... it just happened." Sean said rapidly, "I don't even know what she did with it, for all I know she got an abortion." Sean went back to staring at the television screen, trying to think back on the day in which it all happened.  
  
++ Flashback ++  
  
"I've always hated Valentine's Day." Katarine says, sitting on the edge of Sean's bed and watching him flip through a cd jacket.  
  
"Same here." Sean agrees, walking over to his stereo and putting in a cd. "It's just another Hallmark holiday, besides with my parents always drunk it's just like every other day."  
  
Katarine shuts her math book, "You know that that's an obsessive love song?" She asks when 'Losing My Religion' creates soft background music.  
  
Sean nods, "It's a good song though." He presses the shuffle button and walks across the room to Katarine, "Are we still boycotting holiday? Or can I go all hypocratable and give you your gift?" He looks down at Katarine.  
  
"You didn't have to get me anything..."  
  
"Of course I did." Sean takes Katarine's hands and pulls her to her feet. Pulling out a small box from his denim jacket, Sean hands the wrapped package to Katarine. "I hope you like it, took me an entire month to find it."  
  
Katarine smiles, "I'm sure I will." She carefully unwraps the present (bleeding heart wrapping paper isn't something you see everyday) and opens the box. Her eyes light up as she pulls a 3-D skull locket out of its home. "It's beautiful."  
  
"Open it." Sean says, unable to hide his joy that his girlfriend likes the gift.  
  
Katarine does so; inside there are two small pictures, Sean on one side and Katarine on the other. "I love it."  
  
"I thought you would." Sean says.  
  
Katarine puts on the locket then picks her backpack up from the floor. "I'm glad you spoke first," she chuckles, "because I got you something too. It's not much and I won't blame you if you hate it..." She pulls out a plain, brown papered box and bites her lip as she hands it to Sean.  
  
"Why would I hate it?" Sean asks, holding the gift in his hand, "It's from you, isn't it?"  
  
Katarine laughs nervously, "You're hard to buy presents for, so I had to make it..."  
  
Sean grins and rips at the paper, throws the top of the box over his shoulder, and goggles at the thing resting on the white stuffing. "Kat... you made this?" He picks up the brass knuckles, inspecting them closely with his mouth slightly open. "But..."  
  
"They're not real brass, I didn't have the money. They were really easy to make, did 'em in shop class... I put gold leaf on the metal and antiqued it." Katarine explains, looking at Sean.  
  
Sean, as if knowing what Katarine is going to ask, smiles again and says, "I love them, but you shouldn't have done this for me."  
  
"I wanted to. How many times can you get a chain and be happy about it?" Katarine jokes, "It's not that big of a deal anyway... I'm glad you like them."  
  
Setting the knuckles back in their box, Sean puts them on his desk. "I have to find a place to put them." He says, more to himself than to Katarine, and turns to her. He stays fixated on her for a while, not saying anything until he notices Katarine's odd expression. "You're beautiful, you know that?"  
  
Katarine stifles a scoff, "I'm not. I think you need an eye exam."  
  
"That's not funny." Sean says seriously, "You really are beautiful, but I suppose modesty is a good thing."  
  
"I'm not being modest, I 'm really not beautiful."  
  
Sean walks up to her, looking down into Katarine's eyes and brushing a piece of hair out of her face. "You are, I wouldn't be saying it if you weren't."  
  
Katarine rolls her eyes, "Fine. I don't feel like fighting."  
  
Saying nothing, Sean kisses Katarine. She kisses him back, her hands finding their way to Sean's neck, while Sean's rest on Katarine's hips. The kiss soon becomes more steamier, each getting lost in the moment. Sean gently lays Katarine down on his bed, only breaking the deep kisses for air, and his hand slowly slips under Katarine's shirt. Soon they're both in their undergarments, Sean on top of Katarine and again staring deep into her eyes. "If... if you don't want to do this... If you want me to stop... just say the word a-and I will." He tells her.  
  
Katarine nods, a small knot forming in her stomach. "I will..."  
  
Almost ashamed of himself, Sean reaches over, his eyes still locked on Katarine's, and opens his night stand drawer.  
  
++ End Flashback ++ 


	5. Promises

Sean dreaded going to school the next day. After Tracker's speech about responsibility and the usual shit dealing with pregnancy out of wet lock, Sean would be thankful to be struck by lightning or to be nowhere near the province. He sighed as he opened his locker, staring absent mindedly at a poster of a 1967 Mustang drop top. Slamming his locker shut suddenly, Sean walked off to the MI lab and took a seat in the back. He watched students file into the classroom, heart sinking like a stone as Emma walked in.  
  
The only open seat left was by Sean, needless to say Emma would probably kill Mama Onu than sit next to him. She had a disgusted look on her face as she walked to the nearest station; Katarine's computer. "Excuse me. Could you move to a desk in the back, I'd like to sit here." Emma said, rather emotionless.  
  
"I don't know if you notice this," Katarine replied, "But I'm not moving, and I won't be getting out of this seat until the class is over with."  
  
Emma's jaw set for a moment or two, "Maybe all the dye in your hair has effected your brain. I need this seat."  
  
"What you need is," Katarine said still focusing on the computer monitor, "to learn that you can't have everything you want. Move along now."  
  
Facing turning an odd shade of red, Emma storms off to the only open computer. Slamming her books down, she logged into the computer and tried to pretend that Sean was sitting next to her.  
  
With several minutes left until the class began, Sean opened an Instant Message window and tapped the keys on the keyboard before typing "I need to talk to you..." and clicked send. He looked over the computer monitor and willed Katarine to either turn around and look at him or type a message back.  
  
"So you're 'talking' to me through a computer?" Katarine sent back and a few seconds later "I always knew you were too much of a coward to talk to people to their faces."  
  
Sean bit his lip and his fingers slowly found the correct letters, "You don't have to bite my head off." There are no replies after that, but Sean caught Katarine shaking her head.  
  
"All right, class?" Mr. Simpson asked as he walked into the room. He didn't seem to be as angry as usual but, then again, the class barely started. "Today we're going to be working on images. I trust you've all read the sheets I handed out yesterday, so you should know that to do. Each of you are going to find a picture or two on the internet, save it/them to your file, and use Adobe to make them interesting. Feel free to do what you want, but I don't want to see any explicit pictures. Do not plagiarize, I will not be responsible if my students get into legal trouble."  
  
Everyone got to work, Sean finishing up rather quickly and staring at the desktop wallpaper. He began to drift off, swimming in his thoughts and worries, and soon entered another memory of Katarine and him.  
  
++ Flashback ++  
  
Sean leans down and presses his lips against Katarine's, placing his right hand to her neck and rubbing the warm skin softly with his thumb. He closes the gap between him and her, his chest nearly pressing against Katarine's. The next thing Sean knows, he's being pushed away. "Come on." He says softly.  
  
"I really need to talk to you, Sean."  
  
Trying not to frown, Sean looks at the half-scared, half-bothered expression on his girlfriend's face. "What is it?"  
  
"Maybe you should sit down..."  
  
"I'm fine standing. What's wrong, Kat?" Sean's eyebrows furrow with worry, "Is something going on?"  
  
Katarine sits down on her bed, wringing her hands, "I..." She takes a deep breath, "I think that I might be..."  
  
"What? You're not ill, are you?"  
  
Katarine tries to laugh, "I wish that I was."  
  
Sean's expression drops, "You shouldn't talk like that."  
  
Now studying her hands, Katarine tries to put a sentence together. "I think I might be... well, I- I'm late." She says the last part so quickly that it sounds as though she just changed subjects.  
  
"Late?" Sean repeats, not really getting what Katarine is saying.  
  
"I think that I might be pregnant, Sean." Katarine rushes out, still staring at her hands.  
  
Sean stands there, knees wanting to buckle. "You what?" He asks weakly, feeling like he might faint or throw up... both if possible.  
  
Katarine hands her head, "I haven't taken a test yet -I'm too scared to- but..." Her voice trails off again. "What am I going to do? My parents are going to have my head if I am."  
  
"Is it... mine?"  
  
Nodding, Katarine tries to hold back tears. "Of course it's yours."  
  
Sean feels like he's in the Twilight Zone, not knowing what to do or what's going on. His stomach lurches and then twists into a knot, his heart beating rapidly, and all the blood in him rushing to his feet. Sean, scared to an inch of his life, doesn't know what to say... Eventually, panicking, he says. "I, uh, I... I have to go. I'll talk to you later, I promise." And with that, Sean turns around and leaves.  
  
++ End Flashback ++ 


End file.
